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  • Writer's pictureSteve Hoffman

Losing the Weight of Expectations

Expectations have often been a thorn in my side. They seem to weigh me down with heavy, burdensome feelings. Just the word "expectations" use to make me cringe. A little success can bring unwanted expectations. Today as I was thinking about the launch of my upcoming book, I sensed that expectations were creating anxiety in me. Listed below are a few tricks I use to shift to a better feeling place.

1) First, determine the source of the expectations.

Are these expectations I have of myself? Are these expectations that I perceive others have of me? Or are they really expectations that others have of me? I try to look at my true desires and ignore the expectations others have of me. Seeking to please the outside world is a sure path to unhappiness.

2) Next, ask "Why do I want these desires?"

This shifts my thinking to all of the wonderful benefits of achieving these desires, and I begin to imagine myself in the desired situation. Asking "How do I achieve these desires?" only adds stress. Stick to the "whys."

3) Think of how far I have come.

We are survivors. We have made it this far and are getting better and better at this thing called life. We deserve to expect good outcomes!

4) Let go of attachment to a desired ending.

So what if the current situation doesn't live up to expectations. Likewise, so what if it exceeds everyone's wildest dreams? Let go of the need for a particular outcome and also let go of the need to know the outcome. Just ride the flow of life. It's all good. Really.

I hope these tips help you better deal with the anxiety of expectations, and I hope you like this article. But then again, that is not my concern. I put these tips out there because it is my desire to assist others in feeling good and writing this felt good, but the outcome is now out of my hands. See what I did there?


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